Tis the end of June Hols 2009.
What have I accomplished this June?
1. Science Room Decoration
2. Attended both camps
3. Tossed up another Science Daily Lesson Guide.
4. Reenergised
5. Tidied up (marginally) my work desk
6. Tidying up (major) watashi no hei an.
7. Did major laundering.
8. Fluffed up again
9. Reminisced over the past.
What do I want to accomplish in Term 3?
1. Keeping my room clean and tidy.
2. Keeping my workdesk clean and tidy.
3. Remodel my classroom.
4. Develop a much much closer relationship with God.
5. Give up a huge percentage of anime and manga (just like Yuu Chan)
6. Work hard and get my deadlines met.
7. Be a lot more efficient.
8. Catch up with more people. :)
9. Read my bible a lot more.
10. Pray unceasingly.
11. Exercise.
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Monday, June 8, 2009
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Natsuyasumi Banzai!
Wow! It's really been ages since I touched my blog... errr... same with cleaning my room.... :P
So just some updates...
Life has been soooo busy! You'd think that now that I'm no longer a level manager or an AC, I would have a lot more time to rest and relax. Well... think again! To be fair, I am slightly less busy but I accredit that to better time management rather than less work. I also accredit that to things being calmer at home. :D Since things are calmer at home and I don't have so much stress, I sleep much better and am sick less.
I have also been regularly munching on ginseng. Yup, you got it, the ginseng bits that they sell at meds shops, however, you can't overdose on that else other things might happen. However, I must say, I do feel that I have more energy. Imagine, I managed to last through this whole term without taking mc at all :D Glory be to God! I did pray and ask that I will not have to take mc this term so it was an answered prayer!
However, due to my busy schedule, taking a cab in the morning was still a must. However, I managed to reach a few goals of mine. The first goal--save some money. Well, it didn't work out as rosily as I wanted it to... however, I'm still working on the saving of money. :D I managed to save a couple of hundred within the last two months as compared to zilch previously. I also managed to contribute quite a bit to family finances and am giving both parents an allowance of sorts. As a result, my dad kindly agreed to fetch me to my work place in the mornings. While it isn't everyday that I get a lift, I do get lifts often enough to offset my previous cab expenditure significantly. :D The next goal will be to take less cabs going home eg. on days when I get lifts from colleagues to the mrt, I shall make it a point to take public transport not involving cabs. :D If that works, then the expenditure on cabs will be minimised. Of course on days when it's storming etc, it may be a little impossible not to take cabs but at least it should be minimised. I always feel guilty when I see other colleagues saving money by walking or taking buses even when they earn much more than I do... hee...
Actually, this month, I could have saved a lot more. However, I wanted to give my kids a farewell party. One of our little girls is leaving for Korea, so I thought it would be nice if we had a farewell party to remember her by. Then I also had various expenses for my stage production. Buying cloth alone to make props and costumes cost me $100+, throwing a little celebration was another $100+, buying crap for the holidays to enjoy was another $200. Investing in books for the pupils so that there will be a better library and they won't get bored (although to be honest, they won't be able to finish going through my library just yet) cost me another $300+ and of course, paying for transportation to my holiday destination cost $100+. Throw in the makan sessions after exams with close friends etc and the not so vital expenditure goes way above $1000 easily. Bring in what I give to my parents, my cab expenditure, my phone bills, my dinner bills.... that's quite a huge amount of money. However, God has really been gracious. He has given me many things so I'm quite happy with life at the moment.
Recently, I've received accolades from both supervisors and colleagues alike, as well as from customers. Life is good. However, this only gives me greater incentive to work hard on my stuff during the hols eg. doing more work etc. Now, it's time to chill out for the moment so... beaches here I come. :D
So just some updates...
Life has been soooo busy! You'd think that now that I'm no longer a level manager or an AC, I would have a lot more time to rest and relax. Well... think again! To be fair, I am slightly less busy but I accredit that to better time management rather than less work. I also accredit that to things being calmer at home. :D Since things are calmer at home and I don't have so much stress, I sleep much better and am sick less.
I have also been regularly munching on ginseng. Yup, you got it, the ginseng bits that they sell at meds shops, however, you can't overdose on that else other things might happen. However, I must say, I do feel that I have more energy. Imagine, I managed to last through this whole term without taking mc at all :D Glory be to God! I did pray and ask that I will not have to take mc this term so it was an answered prayer!
However, due to my busy schedule, taking a cab in the morning was still a must. However, I managed to reach a few goals of mine. The first goal--save some money. Well, it didn't work out as rosily as I wanted it to... however, I'm still working on the saving of money. :D I managed to save a couple of hundred within the last two months as compared to zilch previously. I also managed to contribute quite a bit to family finances and am giving both parents an allowance of sorts. As a result, my dad kindly agreed to fetch me to my work place in the mornings. While it isn't everyday that I get a lift, I do get lifts often enough to offset my previous cab expenditure significantly. :D The next goal will be to take less cabs going home eg. on days when I get lifts from colleagues to the mrt, I shall make it a point to take public transport not involving cabs. :D If that works, then the expenditure on cabs will be minimised. Of course on days when it's storming etc, it may be a little impossible not to take cabs but at least it should be minimised. I always feel guilty when I see other colleagues saving money by walking or taking buses even when they earn much more than I do... hee...
Actually, this month, I could have saved a lot more. However, I wanted to give my kids a farewell party. One of our little girls is leaving for Korea, so I thought it would be nice if we had a farewell party to remember her by. Then I also had various expenses for my stage production. Buying cloth alone to make props and costumes cost me $100+, throwing a little celebration was another $100+, buying crap for the holidays to enjoy was another $200. Investing in books for the pupils so that there will be a better library and they won't get bored (although to be honest, they won't be able to finish going through my library just yet) cost me another $300+ and of course, paying for transportation to my holiday destination cost $100+. Throw in the makan sessions after exams with close friends etc and the not so vital expenditure goes way above $1000 easily. Bring in what I give to my parents, my cab expenditure, my phone bills, my dinner bills.... that's quite a huge amount of money. However, God has really been gracious. He has given me many things so I'm quite happy with life at the moment.
Recently, I've received accolades from both supervisors and colleagues alike, as well as from customers. Life is good. However, this only gives me greater incentive to work hard on my stuff during the hols eg. doing more work etc. Now, it's time to chill out for the moment so... beaches here I come. :D
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Updates for the new year
YAY! I have managed to label and organise my office table, hence, it IS looking neater... or was... at any rate, it's a lot easier to clean up now cos I can just put stuff neatly back. I also know where EVERYTHING is so when my colleagues need something, I can loan it to them easily. :D I've also REALLY cut back on the stuff that I have needed to buy -- save money part 1 DAisakusen!
BUT!!!! well... I've still been taking cabs quite a bit. Every morning actually. :P At first it cost me $12-$13 in the morning without calling for cabs if I leave the house at 6.45 and I run the risk of being late to boot. So I woke up earlier and discovered... SHIT... there are no cabs before 7 near my place.... So recently, I CALLED a cab at 6.25am, it arrives at 6.30-6.35 and I reach school really early but it only costs $11... about $3 more ex than my previous trips during peak hour. Next, I'm going to start working on NOT taking cabs everyday. Good plan? The successful part of my plan is that at least I don't take cabs home everyday now. Instead, I usually manage to get a lift to the mrt station and then I take a short mrt back to the bus interchange followed by a short wait and a short 5-10min trip (depending on traffic conditions) to the bus stop and then home from there.
After I get used to this routine (hopefully by March, I'd stop taking cabs most of the time), I'll be embarking on the keep fit program followed by a trip to my friend's family chinese medicine doctor who is definitely very good at what she's doing. :D I'll attempt to discipline myself on the diet I'm sure she'll advise me on and then let's see what happens, shall we? Meanwhile, am enjoying POT--That's Prince of Tennis to the uninitiated. :D
Cheers!
BUT!!!! well... I've still been taking cabs quite a bit. Every morning actually. :P At first it cost me $12-$13 in the morning without calling for cabs if I leave the house at 6.45 and I run the risk of being late to boot. So I woke up earlier and discovered... SHIT... there are no cabs before 7 near my place.... So recently, I CALLED a cab at 6.25am, it arrives at 6.30-6.35 and I reach school really early but it only costs $11... about $3 more ex than my previous trips during peak hour. Next, I'm going to start working on NOT taking cabs everyday. Good plan? The successful part of my plan is that at least I don't take cabs home everyday now. Instead, I usually manage to get a lift to the mrt station and then I take a short mrt back to the bus interchange followed by a short wait and a short 5-10min trip (depending on traffic conditions) to the bus stop and then home from there.
After I get used to this routine (hopefully by March, I'd stop taking cabs most of the time), I'll be embarking on the keep fit program followed by a trip to my friend's family chinese medicine doctor who is definitely very good at what she's doing. :D I'll attempt to discipline myself on the diet I'm sure she'll advise me on and then let's see what happens, shall we? Meanwhile, am enjoying POT--That's Prince of Tennis to the uninitiated. :D
Cheers!
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Reflections...
Just some reflections. I haven't visited this blog in ages. And as I visit, for some reason, I feel as if I'm brushing away a thin layer of dust that's landed ever so gently on it.
This has been a really busy year and as I read last December's entries... I can't help but sweatdrop.
I have NOT saved. I'm instead still very much a binbou nin. Even though my pay has increased considerably, and I pay less for my bank loan. I have however, managed to reach the stage where I do not have to Borrow to survive. Instead, I can subsist on just what I earn from my main job alone. This while still paying my bills regularly and giving money to mum. I have NOT tithed. Sigh...
So, while there has been some improvement, I can't say that it's a total improvement. Ganbatte mashou!
Next year, since this is already the last month of the year, I would like to embark on my rather ambitious SLSM program. In case you're wondering what on earth is SLSM, let me enlighten you--it's called the Spend Less Save More program.
To embark on this program, I have put in place certain guidelines and structures.
Step One! Shift Tables and label everything...
How will this help me save money pray tell?
Well, by shifting tables from my previous rather cluttered table to the new one, I forced myself to stock take and clean up. Hence, my newest location is beautiful and I took the opportunity to label while organizing. The stock take was very effective because I realised that many times, I bought items from Popular or other places BECAUSE I forgot where I had placed a certain item or because I thought I had finished my supply of a particular item. By labelling, after use, I'll (keeps fingers crossed) keep the items back in their proper positions and only buy new ones after I've completed them.
On stock taking, I also cannot honestly say I need new stationery--I've tons of those... SWEATDROP!
I also have tons of resources--unused. So, next year, since I have more or less exhausted my need for resources, my only book expenditures will be on novels that I really want to read--there aren't that many authors I really want to read, so I think I'm quite safe.
Step Two! Shift Homes
After one yr of attempting to take public transport, I came to the conclusion that I am failing because of the location of my home. It is just too convenient. Most of the time, I just have to wait a couple of moments before I get a cab from the comfort of my front door as compared to waiting 20 minutes for the bus. Plus, because my current location is only a relatively short distance away from my work place, cab charges (even with peak hour charges) isn't all that ex--less than $10 to and fro. So the temptation to sleep in and then catch a cab has been proving too great for little old me. Plus, I cab to my tuition places etc...and back again.
Calculating the cost at the end of the year has been a rather sombre affair--I realise that if I just factor in cabbing to and fro --just twice a day (weekends included), I have been spending a whopping $600 every month on just cab fares alone!
=.= Thankfully, I'm shifting end of this year.
How does that help? Well, firstly, the place I'm shifting to is near an MRT station, and clogs up early in the morning with traffic. Cabs are scarcer because my new place will be inconveniently located on the top of a hill. It is simply NOT economical to take a cab to my workplace and even if I wanted to, I wouldn't be able to get there on time or, perhaps even get a cab to begin with. This means, I will wake up earlier (since I have no choice) and walk (thus exercise and execute slimming program simultaneously) to MRT and take the MRT which will be ridiculously faster than if I were to take a cab. I am definitely NOT paying MORE for something that takes longer.
So, factoring in 2 feeder bus rides and one mrt ride, the total cost to and fro is now--> $4 a day which amounts to about $88 a month for working days. The new place is also tons nearer to my new church--VFC! Which means that going to church I will also save money! Woohoo! So even if I cab to and fro on weekends to church or to town --> total cost of transport is going to be less than $200! That leaves me with an extra $400 to save!
Step 3! Change my handphone subscription program
I changed my phone subscription from M1 to Singtel and am saving tons. It used to be that my phone bills would be about $150 a month. With my new plan, it is only $75 and that's with a data plan included. That could explain why I'm able to subsist without my moonlighting these couple of months. I think I can further save money if I change the plan further to a corporate plan since my company has one. :D Even a few tens saved will be great!
Step4! Change my dietary habits
By changing to a healthier new me diet plan, I hope to save more money! How so? Vegetables are always cheaper are they not? Plus currently, I figure that I'm really really spending a lot of money on weekdays--out dining with my friends at expensive places like Mayim and Swenson's and other even more lavish places. Once in a while is fine, but I think I'm really pushing it.
The rich food is adding many spare tyres to my girth so much so that I do look like Michelin Man... SOB.... by eating more fruits and veges, firstly, I'm doing my entire body a favour. Fruits and veggies are good for cleaning out stuff and prevention of cancer. They also help to supplement my water intake. Secondly, fruits and veggies are cheaper than meat and more eco-friendly. Meat takes up more resources to grow and import. Next, they provide me with vitamins and minerals which should help me keep healthy--reducing need and expenditure on medical services. I've been mcing quite a bit. This will also help me present a better work profile and when I slim down, my clothes expenditure will go down. Right now, I'm spending a lot on branded clothing cos my usual This Fashion clothes simply won't fit or even Giordano. With a slimmer me, I can definitely fit more clothing at many other stores, which means cheaper alternatives.
Step 5! Simplify my life!
Less stuff. This is something that I'm appreciating now, because I'm moving homes remember? The sheer amount of stuff is really AMAZING! I also simplified my work profile by requesting to step down from certain stressful positions. At least one stressful position has been removed--this will lead to a healthier and less lethargic me thus leading to greater willingness to crawl out of bed earlier and sleep better. The amount of sleep I've lost this year has been contributing to much unhappiness at my work place. I'm THAT much grouchier when I don't get enough sleep. Also, the constant having to tiptoe around some person at work ADDS to the unhappiness. With this job gone, I'm FREE!!!!! and life becomes that much simpler. I also see the need to make my new place zenlike--that is simplify and everything keep neatly labeled in the wardrobe so my new room will look like those showrooms one sees in the new condos. Grins. This will make me more willing to come back earlier and save more money.
Step 6! Tithe!
The next step I'm working on is tithing. I think tithing is a huge issue for me because I'm not disciplined enough. However, I think when I tithe, just like when I give money to my mum, it affects me psychologically. It sends a message straight away to my brain that I have a lot less to spend and automatically, I find myself more willing to do things that will save money instead of the opposite. That's important to me as I happen to be one of the least self-disciplined beings on earth... sniff. So what I'm going to do is, the moment I get my pay, I will set aside tithes and allowance for mum immediately, so the psychological factor kicks in almost immediately.
Step 7! Set up new account!
Currently, I have only 3 accounts--bank loan account (where everything I put in gets siphoned off); my savings account where my salary gets credited and my current account which I keep bare most of the time unless necessary. I need a new account with another bank. Cos I find if I transfer funds immediately on the day that my pay comes in, I can't spend it and most importantly, again, the psychological factor of the binbou nin kicks in. I'm going to start this year with whatever I can afford first so that next year, I'll feel inclined to save which brings me to Step 8!
Step 8! Have a goal--several goals!
I'm saving for new furniture. I'm moving home. Thank God there are built-in cabinets and wardrobes. That makes life so much simpler for me cos wardrobes have gotta be the most ex thing on the list. Now I can strike it off the list. I'm also having my friends and family members get me furniture vouchers from muji (if they have it) and from Ikea :D Maybe I can even get my stuff for free!
Second goal to save for--Trip for the parents.
I'd like to save money so that I can give my parents a short trip with the money. I'm figuring about $2000 each parent so that they can have fun at my expense... no la, in the past, when we were kids, they gave us trips too wat... so now is a good time to treat them, esp since I can foresee mum feeling blue about her job.
Third goal to save for--Trip for me!
I'm saving for a trip to go to Japan. That is probably going to take quite a bit of okane... cos it's Japan. It's bound to be ex, and I have absolutely no wish to scrimp and save when I go on holiday :P
Fourth goal--bank pays me money instead.
Right now, I'm paying $2 every month to my banks for each of my accounts --that's $6 a month and $72 a year. When I save money, the bank will pay me instead through interest and such. :D So this is my goal. To make my money grow money for me.
Fifth goal--to utilize my other funds and invest wisely. So that my money grows money for me. :D
I think that's about it for now. :D
This has been a really busy year and as I read last December's entries... I can't help but sweatdrop.
I have NOT saved. I'm instead still very much a binbou nin. Even though my pay has increased considerably, and I pay less for my bank loan. I have however, managed to reach the stage where I do not have to Borrow to survive. Instead, I can subsist on just what I earn from my main job alone. This while still paying my bills regularly and giving money to mum. I have NOT tithed. Sigh...
So, while there has been some improvement, I can't say that it's a total improvement. Ganbatte mashou!
Next year, since this is already the last month of the year, I would like to embark on my rather ambitious SLSM program. In case you're wondering what on earth is SLSM, let me enlighten you--it's called the Spend Less Save More program.
To embark on this program, I have put in place certain guidelines and structures.
Step One! Shift Tables and label everything...
How will this help me save money pray tell?
Well, by shifting tables from my previous rather cluttered table to the new one, I forced myself to stock take and clean up. Hence, my newest location is beautiful and I took the opportunity to label while organizing. The stock take was very effective because I realised that many times, I bought items from Popular or other places BECAUSE I forgot where I had placed a certain item or because I thought I had finished my supply of a particular item. By labelling, after use, I'll (keeps fingers crossed) keep the items back in their proper positions and only buy new ones after I've completed them.
On stock taking, I also cannot honestly say I need new stationery--I've tons of those... SWEATDROP!
I also have tons of resources--unused. So, next year, since I have more or less exhausted my need for resources, my only book expenditures will be on novels that I really want to read--there aren't that many authors I really want to read, so I think I'm quite safe.
Step Two! Shift Homes
After one yr of attempting to take public transport, I came to the conclusion that I am failing because of the location of my home. It is just too convenient. Most of the time, I just have to wait a couple of moments before I get a cab from the comfort of my front door as compared to waiting 20 minutes for the bus. Plus, because my current location is only a relatively short distance away from my work place, cab charges (even with peak hour charges) isn't all that ex--less than $10 to and fro. So the temptation to sleep in and then catch a cab has been proving too great for little old me. Plus, I cab to my tuition places etc...and back again.
Calculating the cost at the end of the year has been a rather sombre affair--I realise that if I just factor in cabbing to and fro --just twice a day (weekends included), I have been spending a whopping $600 every month on just cab fares alone!
=.= Thankfully, I'm shifting end of this year.
How does that help? Well, firstly, the place I'm shifting to is near an MRT station, and clogs up early in the morning with traffic. Cabs are scarcer because my new place will be inconveniently located on the top of a hill. It is simply NOT economical to take a cab to my workplace and even if I wanted to, I wouldn't be able to get there on time or, perhaps even get a cab to begin with. This means, I will wake up earlier (since I have no choice) and walk (thus exercise and execute slimming program simultaneously) to MRT and take the MRT which will be ridiculously faster than if I were to take a cab. I am definitely NOT paying MORE for something that takes longer.
So, factoring in 2 feeder bus rides and one mrt ride, the total cost to and fro is now--> $4 a day which amounts to about $88 a month for working days. The new place is also tons nearer to my new church--VFC! Which means that going to church I will also save money! Woohoo! So even if I cab to and fro on weekends to church or to town --> total cost of transport is going to be less than $200! That leaves me with an extra $400 to save!
Step 3! Change my handphone subscription program
I changed my phone subscription from M1 to Singtel and am saving tons. It used to be that my phone bills would be about $150 a month. With my new plan, it is only $75 and that's with a data plan included. That could explain why I'm able to subsist without my moonlighting these couple of months. I think I can further save money if I change the plan further to a corporate plan since my company has one. :D Even a few tens saved will be great!
Step4! Change my dietary habits
By changing to a healthier new me diet plan, I hope to save more money! How so? Vegetables are always cheaper are they not? Plus currently, I figure that I'm really really spending a lot of money on weekdays--out dining with my friends at expensive places like Mayim and Swenson's and other even more lavish places. Once in a while is fine, but I think I'm really pushing it.
The rich food is adding many spare tyres to my girth so much so that I do look like Michelin Man... SOB.... by eating more fruits and veges, firstly, I'm doing my entire body a favour. Fruits and veggies are good for cleaning out stuff and prevention of cancer. They also help to supplement my water intake. Secondly, fruits and veggies are cheaper than meat and more eco-friendly. Meat takes up more resources to grow and import. Next, they provide me with vitamins and minerals which should help me keep healthy--reducing need and expenditure on medical services. I've been mcing quite a bit. This will also help me present a better work profile and when I slim down, my clothes expenditure will go down. Right now, I'm spending a lot on branded clothing cos my usual This Fashion clothes simply won't fit or even Giordano. With a slimmer me, I can definitely fit more clothing at many other stores, which means cheaper alternatives.
Step 5! Simplify my life!
Less stuff. This is something that I'm appreciating now, because I'm moving homes remember? The sheer amount of stuff is really AMAZING! I also simplified my work profile by requesting to step down from certain stressful positions. At least one stressful position has been removed--this will lead to a healthier and less lethargic me thus leading to greater willingness to crawl out of bed earlier and sleep better. The amount of sleep I've lost this year has been contributing to much unhappiness at my work place. I'm THAT much grouchier when I don't get enough sleep. Also, the constant having to tiptoe around some person at work ADDS to the unhappiness. With this job gone, I'm FREE!!!!! and life becomes that much simpler. I also see the need to make my new place zenlike--that is simplify and everything keep neatly labeled in the wardrobe so my new room will look like those showrooms one sees in the new condos. Grins. This will make me more willing to come back earlier and save more money.
Step 6! Tithe!
The next step I'm working on is tithing. I think tithing is a huge issue for me because I'm not disciplined enough. However, I think when I tithe, just like when I give money to my mum, it affects me psychologically. It sends a message straight away to my brain that I have a lot less to spend and automatically, I find myself more willing to do things that will save money instead of the opposite. That's important to me as I happen to be one of the least self-disciplined beings on earth... sniff. So what I'm going to do is, the moment I get my pay, I will set aside tithes and allowance for mum immediately, so the psychological factor kicks in almost immediately.
Step 7! Set up new account!
Currently, I have only 3 accounts--bank loan account (where everything I put in gets siphoned off); my savings account where my salary gets credited and my current account which I keep bare most of the time unless necessary. I need a new account with another bank. Cos I find if I transfer funds immediately on the day that my pay comes in, I can't spend it and most importantly, again, the psychological factor of the binbou nin kicks in. I'm going to start this year with whatever I can afford first so that next year, I'll feel inclined to save which brings me to Step 8!
Step 8! Have a goal--several goals!
I'm saving for new furniture. I'm moving home. Thank God there are built-in cabinets and wardrobes. That makes life so much simpler for me cos wardrobes have gotta be the most ex thing on the list. Now I can strike it off the list. I'm also having my friends and family members get me furniture vouchers from muji (if they have it) and from Ikea :D Maybe I can even get my stuff for free!
Second goal to save for--Trip for the parents.
I'd like to save money so that I can give my parents a short trip with the money. I'm figuring about $2000 each parent so that they can have fun at my expense... no la, in the past, when we were kids, they gave us trips too wat... so now is a good time to treat them, esp since I can foresee mum feeling blue about her job.
Third goal to save for--Trip for me!
I'm saving for a trip to go to Japan. That is probably going to take quite a bit of okane... cos it's Japan. It's bound to be ex, and I have absolutely no wish to scrimp and save when I go on holiday :P
Fourth goal--bank pays me money instead.
Right now, I'm paying $2 every month to my banks for each of my accounts --that's $6 a month and $72 a year. When I save money, the bank will pay me instead through interest and such. :D So this is my goal. To make my money grow money for me.
Fifth goal--to utilize my other funds and invest wisely. So that my money grows money for me. :D
I think that's about it for now. :D
Monday, January 7, 2008
TIRED
There's obviously something wrong when one finds oneself looking forward to the NEXT december holidays. Within just days, I can officially say I've never been so damn busy before! URGLE!
I've got all sorts of duties? I DEFINITELY do NOT wish to climb the corporate ladder. DEFINITELY NOT in the curriculum for me. Looking on the bright side, I've finished photostating the fortnight's worth of exercises for my kids. MWAHAHAHA.
:D
Evil am I.
Well... tomorrow's level meeting but before that, there's tons to do again... sniff... BOOHOO!
I find myself dreading not so much as the start of the school day but the end of school as AFTER that, my "After curriculum activities" begin. EEP!
I've got all sorts of duties? I DEFINITELY do NOT wish to climb the corporate ladder. DEFINITELY NOT in the curriculum for me. Looking on the bright side, I've finished photostating the fortnight's worth of exercises for my kids. MWAHAHAHA.
:D
Evil am I.
Well... tomorrow's level meeting but before that, there's tons to do again... sniff... BOOHOO!
I find myself dreading not so much as the start of the school day but the end of school as AFTER that, my "After curriculum activities" begin. EEP!
Thursday, December 20, 2007
I choose.
Everyday we come across many crossroads--some trivial, some life-changing. We make choices both unconsciously as well as consciously, every single moment of our lives. And for everything that is chosen, something else is forsaken/ given up. Choices lead you through all sorts of roads and paths. For example, I'm choosing to write this blog now, at this very moment. What I'm choosing is to forgo that bit of sleep for the sake of the peace that comes from writing this blog. Sleep is good but getting something off my chest will probably ensure that I sleep better.
So these are my choices.
I choose...
To pray. For I believe that prayer is communication with God. I believe also that God wants to be involved in every single part of my life, even the mucky parts like when my bowels aren't moving or the bus is late. I believe that prayer activates God not because He is some sort of supernatural machine. Indeed if He was nothing more than a supernatural vending machine then God would not be God. He is there at all times and many times, He's known what it is we need and has started to put into place things that will happen when we pray to increase our faith.
To believe in God's love. I believe that God who made us loves us. That many times the suffering and the misery we come across is the result of man's folly. Yet why then does He allow us to suffer and to go through the many trials and heartaches that we seem to face almost at every turn in our lives? Because through the suffering, we have choices. Through the suffering, we know ourselves and others better. Through the suffering, we grow. And most of all, suffering highlights to us what is most important to us. Last but not least, suffering allows us to experience the grace of God and our fellowmen. For example, if I had not had that really horrible cough last year which almost killed me, and if I had not had so little that I was wondering if I could actually pay for the doctor, I would not have been able to appreciate how fragile life is and that each moment living is but grace from God. I would not have learnt truly that this time we have here is NOT mine. I do not control time. I would not have experienced the grace of the doctor who told me, if you don't have money, you can always pay me another time. It is more important that you recover.
To love. When is it hardest to love? It is not hard to love cute adorable babies, friends and those who love you. Why? Because most people do love beautiful things and we are essentially self-centered. However, it is remarkably difficult to love someone who is always antagonistic to you. Who berates you and insists that you are wrong even when you are right. Who hits you for no reason. Who tests your patience. Who is demented. That is when it is most difficult to love. But then, that is when love is most beautiful, most precious. Because it costs the most and it takes the most energy. You know, when you first start to love these people who do not deserve to love, it is so hard to do it. There is basically no motivation and absolutely no reward. Indeed, at times, your reward is a blow to the face or cutting words. However, if you continue to love without requiring anything in return, miracles happen. Firstly, did you know it makes your soul beautiful? And this beauty shines through. This is what makes the people we love automatically, lovable. Secondly, it changes the other and he or she through you, will grow to become beautiful too. This is a precious gift we bestow on both ourselves as well as others. A love that mirrors that same great love that moved Him to die for us.
To trust. It is hardest to trust a person just after he has betrayed you. Make no mistake, sometimes, a person will betray you many times and some others for eternity. However, I choose to trust God. God who has put this person in my life. God is worthy of my trust and faith. Trust is a medicine for a breached relationship. It allows things to mend without further aggravating or picking at the wound. It grants the person who is being trusted motivation to honour that trust and strength to resist temptation. That is a power that few of us realise and many of us take for granted and few who are willing to give after an incident.
To give of my time. The most precious thing you can give besides all of the above is your time. Firstly, because we take for granted something that can never be reused. Everything else can be bought, from precious baubles to health. However, time alone is something that can never ever be regained once it is used. We don't think much of it because it is just there. But how much of it is left? Do we ever think about that? We take it for granted that we have 70 years or 80 years and we squander all that time away in pursuit of wealth and prestige and fun and laughter and "happiness". But no one stops to ask, do we really have all that time? If time is money, as some say, then where's the accounting? Even small businesses need to keep accounts. And some of us keep personal accounts of our money. So where and when does our accounting of time take place? Even if we do not believe that there is accounting involved, what makes us think that tomorrow we will still have time? Who knows if we will still be alive the next day or the next hour or even the next minute? Think, if today was your very last day alive. What would you be doing? Would you still be working hard at that job? Would you still be angry at your loved one for some petty thing he said today? I don't think so.
Perhaps only the ones who know they don't have much time left are best stewards of that time, though not necessarily so. I have to admit this, I live as if there's a million years left. I still splurge and shop and go out and talk and do everything else that I seem to do. But recently, as one gets older, I can't help but regret the way I've been spending all this time. I regret the various mistakes although not too much, since I did learn things from almost every mistake I've made. I regret spending so little time with the family. I feel that it is in such a state now because I did not play the part that I was supposed to play.
but enough of that.
The last thing I choose is to wait. Waiting is one of the hardest things to do, especially for me. I like to get things over and done with--quickly. Waiting is just not in my character. But now, I choose to wait. To wait for God to show what He has been doing. That is what I choose to wait for. Because at the end of it all, I know He knows what is best for me. He loves with such love that could only be expressed in the things He;s done. That's why I choose to wait, to trust, to love. Because He waited for me, He trusted me and He loves me.
So these are my choices.
I choose...
To pray. For I believe that prayer is communication with God. I believe also that God wants to be involved in every single part of my life, even the mucky parts like when my bowels aren't moving or the bus is late. I believe that prayer activates God not because He is some sort of supernatural machine. Indeed if He was nothing more than a supernatural vending machine then God would not be God. He is there at all times and many times, He's known what it is we need and has started to put into place things that will happen when we pray to increase our faith.
To believe in God's love. I believe that God who made us loves us. That many times the suffering and the misery we come across is the result of man's folly. Yet why then does He allow us to suffer and to go through the many trials and heartaches that we seem to face almost at every turn in our lives? Because through the suffering, we have choices. Through the suffering, we know ourselves and others better. Through the suffering, we grow. And most of all, suffering highlights to us what is most important to us. Last but not least, suffering allows us to experience the grace of God and our fellowmen. For example, if I had not had that really horrible cough last year which almost killed me, and if I had not had so little that I was wondering if I could actually pay for the doctor, I would not have been able to appreciate how fragile life is and that each moment living is but grace from God. I would not have learnt truly that this time we have here is NOT mine. I do not control time. I would not have experienced the grace of the doctor who told me, if you don't have money, you can always pay me another time. It is more important that you recover.
To love. When is it hardest to love? It is not hard to love cute adorable babies, friends and those who love you. Why? Because most people do love beautiful things and we are essentially self-centered. However, it is remarkably difficult to love someone who is always antagonistic to you. Who berates you and insists that you are wrong even when you are right. Who hits you for no reason. Who tests your patience. Who is demented. That is when it is most difficult to love. But then, that is when love is most beautiful, most precious. Because it costs the most and it takes the most energy. You know, when you first start to love these people who do not deserve to love, it is so hard to do it. There is basically no motivation and absolutely no reward. Indeed, at times, your reward is a blow to the face or cutting words. However, if you continue to love without requiring anything in return, miracles happen. Firstly, did you know it makes your soul beautiful? And this beauty shines through. This is what makes the people we love automatically, lovable. Secondly, it changes the other and he or she through you, will grow to become beautiful too. This is a precious gift we bestow on both ourselves as well as others. A love that mirrors that same great love that moved Him to die for us.
To trust. It is hardest to trust a person just after he has betrayed you. Make no mistake, sometimes, a person will betray you many times and some others for eternity. However, I choose to trust God. God who has put this person in my life. God is worthy of my trust and faith. Trust is a medicine for a breached relationship. It allows things to mend without further aggravating or picking at the wound. It grants the person who is being trusted motivation to honour that trust and strength to resist temptation. That is a power that few of us realise and many of us take for granted and few who are willing to give after an incident.
To give of my time. The most precious thing you can give besides all of the above is your time. Firstly, because we take for granted something that can never be reused. Everything else can be bought, from precious baubles to health. However, time alone is something that can never ever be regained once it is used. We don't think much of it because it is just there. But how much of it is left? Do we ever think about that? We take it for granted that we have 70 years or 80 years and we squander all that time away in pursuit of wealth and prestige and fun and laughter and "happiness". But no one stops to ask, do we really have all that time? If time is money, as some say, then where's the accounting? Even small businesses need to keep accounts. And some of us keep personal accounts of our money. So where and when does our accounting of time take place? Even if we do not believe that there is accounting involved, what makes us think that tomorrow we will still have time? Who knows if we will still be alive the next day or the next hour or even the next minute? Think, if today was your very last day alive. What would you be doing? Would you still be working hard at that job? Would you still be angry at your loved one for some petty thing he said today? I don't think so.
Perhaps only the ones who know they don't have much time left are best stewards of that time, though not necessarily so. I have to admit this, I live as if there's a million years left. I still splurge and shop and go out and talk and do everything else that I seem to do. But recently, as one gets older, I can't help but regret the way I've been spending all this time. I regret the various mistakes although not too much, since I did learn things from almost every mistake I've made. I regret spending so little time with the family. I feel that it is in such a state now because I did not play the part that I was supposed to play.
but enough of that.
The last thing I choose is to wait. Waiting is one of the hardest things to do, especially for me. I like to get things over and done with--quickly. Waiting is just not in my character. But now, I choose to wait. To wait for God to show what He has been doing. That is what I choose to wait for. Because at the end of it all, I know He knows what is best for me. He loves with such love that could only be expressed in the things He;s done. That's why I choose to wait, to trust, to love. Because He waited for me, He trusted me and He loves me.
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